The world is spinning with no apparent exit. I search for a place to jump off, but even if I find it, I get pulled back in. My daughter is on an endless roller coaster ride of emotions and memories. The flashbacks have come back along with the nightmares. It is all brought back to [...]
Posts Tagged ‘denial’
Spinning Worlds…
Posted in Anger, Anxiety, Choices, Daughters, Divorce, Emotions, Fear, Hope, Incest, Keeping Secrets, Life Stories, Losing Innocence, Mothers, Non-Offending Parent, Panic, Rape, Remember, Resiliency, Secrets, Sexual Abuse, Survivors, Victim, childhood sexual abuse, dads, denial, depression, empathy, family, guilt, healing, love, memories, mental health, molestation, understanding, tagged Anger, Anxiety, Belief, childhood sexual abuse, Choices, dads, Daughters, denial, depression, Emotions, family, Fear, guilt, healing, Hope, Incest, Life Stories, love, memories, molestation, Mothers, Non-Offending Parent, Rape, Secrets, Sexual Abuse, Suicide, Survivors, Victim on October 30, 2009 | Leave a Comment »
Sliding Down into Darkness
Posted in Anger, Anxiety, Choices, Daughters, Emotions, Fear, Incest, Justification, Keeping Secrets, Life Stories, Losing Innocence, Mothers, Non-Offending Parent, Panic, Rape, Secrets, Sexual Abuse, Suicide, Survivors, Trust, Victim, childhood sexual abuse, denial, depression, guilt, healing, love, mental health, molestation, tagged Anger, Anxiety, childhood memories, childhood sexual abuse, Choices, dads, Daughters, denial, depression, Emotions, family, Fear, guilt, healing, Incest, Life Stories, love, memories, molestation, Mothers, Non-Offending Parent, Rape, Secrets, Suicide, Survivors, Trust, Victim on October 26, 2009 | Leave a Comment »
The date passed and I did not even give it a thought. Things seemed to be going so well. Now, a month beyond that and I am sliding down into darkness. Fear invades my thoughts as I watch my daughter struggle with choices made and the past that raises its nasty head once again. She [...]
Stirring Up the Muck…
Posted in Anxiety, Belief, Choices, Daughters, Divorce, Emotions, Enablers, Fear, Grandmothers, Happiness, Incest, Justification, Keeping Secrets, Life Stories, Losing Innocence, Mothers, Non-Offending Parent, Rape, Remember, Secrets, Sexual Abuse, Siblings, Sisters, Survivors, Trust, Victim, childhood sexual abuse, dads, denial, depression, empathy, family, grandchildren, granddaughters, guilt, healing, memories, mental health, molestation, taking sides, understanding, tagged Anxiety, Belief, childhood sexual abuse, church of Christ, dads, Daughters, denial, depression, Emotions, Enablers, family, Fear, healing, Incest, Life Stories, memories, molestation, Mothers, Non-Offending Parent, Secrets, Sexual Abuse, Sisters, Survivors, taking sides, Trust, Victim on July 31, 2009 | Leave a Comment »
I cannot believe she said it. No, I guess I can believe it. A comment made without thought to what was being said… that is what she does.
Who is she? My ex-mother-in-law. What did she say? She asked my middle daughter if my youngest daughter (her little sister) still says her dad molested her. When [...]
Mother’s Day: Reflect and Hope
Posted in Anxiety, Belief, Choices, Daughters, Divorce, Emotions, Faith, Fear, Happiness, Hope, Incest, Keeping Secrets, Life Stories, Losing Innocence, Mother's Day, Mothers, Non-Offending Parent, Remember, Resiliency, Secrets, Sexual Abuse, Siblings, Sisters, Survivors, Trust, Victim, childhood sexual abuse, church, church of Christ, control, dads, denial, depression, family, healing, love, memories, molestation, religion, sin, taking sides, understanding, tagged Belief, childhood sexual abuse, Choices, church, church of Christ, dads, Daughters, denial, Emotions, Faith, family, Fear, Happiness, healing, Hope, Incest, Life Stories, love, memories, molestation, Mother's Day, Mothers, Non-Offending Parent, reflections, religion, Resiliency, Secrets, Sexual Abuse, Sisters, survivor, Survivors, taking sides, Trust, Victim on May 29, 2009 | Leave a Comment »
This Mother’s Day held several surprises. Days before it arrived, I received cards and photos from my middle daughter. The words written, touched my heart. Then on the Thursday before, I received a text from my youngest about getting together on Sunday for an early lunch. I met with her and we had a lovely [...]
The Counselor: A Wolf in Sheep’s Clothing
Posted in Anger, Anxiety, Belief, Choices, Daughters, Emotions, Fear, Incest, Justification, Keeping Secrets, Life Stories, Losing Innocence, Non-Offending Parent, Panic, Rape, Remember, Resiliency, Secrets, Sexual Abuse, Suicide, Survivors, Trust, Victim, childhood sexual abuse, control, dads, denial, depression, family, guilt, humankind, memories, mental health, molestation, sexual predator, understanding, tagged Anger, Anxiety, Belief, childhood memories, childhood sexual abuse, Choices, dads, Daughters, denial, depression, Emotions, family, Fear, guilt, healing, Incest, Life Stories, love, memories, molestation, Non-Offending Parent, Rape, Secrets, Sexual Abuse, Suicide, survivor, Trust, Victim on April 20, 2009 | Leave a Comment »
My heart is tight and my emotions right at the brim of tears. The one person who my daughter trusted after her revelation and attempted suicide, turns out to be a wolf in sheep’s clothing.
Contingent upon my daughter’s release from the hospital/treatment program was the proof that she had an appointment with a therapist. They [...]
Flashes Never Fade
Posted in Anger, Anxiety, Belief, Choices, Daughters, Emotions, Incest, Life Stories, Losing Innocence, childhood sexual abuse, control, cutting, dads, denial, depression, guilt, healing, love, tagged Anxiety, childhood sexual abuse, Choices, dads, Daughters, denial, depression, Emotions, Fear, Incest, Life Stories, love, memories, molestation, Mothers, Non-Offending Parent, Rape, Secrets, Sexual Abuse, Suicide, Survivors, Trust, Victim on April 17, 2009 | Leave a Comment »
I am driving to work. I spend a lot of time driving. I am singing along with Bryan Adams at the top of my lungs while reviewing the material for the classes that I will teach that day. Without any sign or warning, the pictures start to flash in my memory. I try to turn [...]
I’ve Seen the Needle…
Posted in Anger, Anxiety, Art, Belief, Choices, Daughters, Emotions, Fear, Happiness, Hope, Incest, Keeping Secrets, Life Stories, Losing Innocence, Lyrics, Mothers, Music, Non-Offending Parent, Rape, Resiliency, Secrets, Sexual Abuse, Suicide, Survivors, Trust, Victim, childhood sexual abuse, control, cutting, dads, denial, depression, guilt, healing, love, memories, mental health, molestation, tattoo, understanding, tagged childhood memories, childhood sexual abuse, Choices, cutting, dads, Daughters, denial, depression, Emotions, Fear, guilt, healing, Incest, Life Stories, love, memories, molestation, Mothers, Non-Offending Parent, Rape, Secrets, Sexual Abuse, Suicide, Survivors, tattoo on March 3, 2009 | 3 Comments »
The call comes in late at night. Once again the car is not working. After a bit of chat, the decision is to have it towed to the shop and she can borrow the truck. Her car is old, but she loves it. We pick her up at the shop and take her to the [...]
Why this blog?
This blog is the writings of a mother who finds out from her 23 year old daughter, that she was molested (from age 7 to age 11 or 12) by her dad and was told "Not to tell, especially not to tell your Mom." My heart aches and within this blog, and I hope to start a dialogue with other mothers who have gone through the same thing...Archives
-
Recent Posts
-
Recent Comments
donottellalice on I’ve Seen the Needl… Ariel on I’ve Seen the Needl… arieljoy28 on Childhood Sexual Abuse: Tellin… paintmebrave on I’ve Seen the Needl… sohurt on Justification and Excuses Give… Ana on Sad, But True: We Are Not… kangaroopaw on No More Secrets -
Top Posts
Tags
Anger Anxiety Belief childhood memories childhood sexual abuse Choices church church of Christ control dads Daughters denial depression Divorce Emotions Enablers Faith false memory family Fear guilt Happiness healing Hope Incest Life Stories love memories molestation Mothers Music Non-Offending Parent Rape religion Resiliency Secrets Sexual Abuse Sisters Suicide Surviving survivor Survivors taking sides Trust Victim
