She is going off the medications. Actually, I just learned that she has already started the process. This leaves me in a worry limbo. How will she do without the medications? Will she be strong enough? Will the emotions once again take over her life? Will she try and take her life once again?
I know [...]
Archive for May, 2008
Worry Limbo
Posted in Anger, Anxiety, Choices, Daughters, Emotions, Enablers, Fear, Happiness, Hope, Incest, Justification, Life Stories, Mothers, Non-Offending Parent, Rape, Resiliency, Secrets, Sexual Abuse, Suicide, Survivors, Victim, childhood sexual abuse, control, dads, denial, depression, family, guilt, healing, love, memories, taking sides, tagged childhood sexual abuse, Choices, dads, daughterd, depression, Emotions, Incest, limbo, medications, Mothers, Non-Offending Parent, Rape, roller coasters, Sexual Abuse, Suicide, Surviving, worry on May 28, 2008 | 3 Comments »
Life is a Denial
Posted in Anger, Anxiety, Choices, Daughters, Divorce, Emotions, Enablers, Faith, Fear, Happiness, Hope, Incest, Justification, Life Stories, Mothers, Non-Offending Parent, Rape, Resiliency, Secrets, Sexual Abuse, Suicide, Survivors, Victim, childhood sexual abuse, church, church of Christ, dads, denial, depression, family, guilt, healing, love, memories, religion, sin, taking sides, tagged believers, betrayal, bible, biblical, childhood sexual abuse, church, church of Christ, dads, Daughters, denial, Faith, godly, Incest, Mothers, Rape, reality, Sexual Abuse, sin, submissive wife on May 24, 2008 | 3 Comments »
He lives his life as if nothing has changed, as if life is grand. During the week, he gets up every morning, goes to work, works all day as an engineer and then comes home to his new wife. On Wednesday nights, he attends bible class. On Sunday, he teaches bible classes, participates at worship, [...]
Landmines of my life
Posted in Anger, Anxiety, Choices, Daughters, Divorce, Emotions, Enablers, Fear, Happiness, Hope, Incest, Justification, Life Stories, Mothers, Non-Offending Parent, Rape, Resiliency, Secrets, Sexual Abuse, Suicide, Survivors, Victim, childhood sexual abuse, control, dads, denial, depression, family, guilt, healing, love, memories, sin, taking sides, tagged abuse, Anger, Anxiety, childhood sexual abuse, Choices, dads, Daughters, denial, depression, family, Fear, guilt, landmines, Sexual Abuse on May 19, 2008 | Leave a Comment »
There are landmines in my life. I cannot see them and do not know ahead of time that I am close to one. They just come like ghosts in the night and flashes in the day. I am fine one minute and then boom, I step on one and my life goes off the rail. [...]
Crying for Us Both
Posted in Anger, Anxiety, Choices, Daughters, Emotions, Enablers, Fear, Happiness, Hope, Incest, Life Stories, Mothers, Non-Offending Parent, Rape, Resiliency, Secrets, Sexual Abuse, Suicide, Survivors, Victim, childhood sexual abuse, control, dads, denial, depression, false memory, family, guilt, healing, love, memories, religion, taking sides, tagged Bittersweet, Cards, childhood sexual abuse, dads, Daughters, Emotions, healing, Heart ache, Incest, love, Mother's Day, Mothers, Non-Offending Parent, Sexual Abuse, Tears on May 14, 2008 | 3 Comments »
Sitting in front of the computer all bleary eyed, I am unsure of these feelings. The music plays as images dance before me with words I read as if I am just learning to read. Each word settles in and overwhelms me. The battles and the pain from the past year rescind for a moment. [...]
I am not…
Posted in Anger, Anxiety, Choices, Daughters, Emotions, Enablers, Fear, Happiness, Hope, Incest, Justification, Life Stories, Mothers, Non-Offending Parent, Rape, Resiliency, Secrets, Sexual Abuse, Suicide, Survivors, Victim, childhood sexual abuse, church, church of Christ, control, dads, denial, depression, false memory, family, guilt, healing, love, memories, religion, taking sides, tagged Anger, axiety, childhood sexual abuse, Choices, control, dads, Daughters, denail, depression, Emotions, Fear, healing, Incest, Life Stories, love, memories, Mothers, Non-Offending Parent, Rape, Resiliency, Secrets, Sexual Abuse, Suicide, Survivors, taking sides, Victim on May 9, 2008 | Leave a Comment »
I am not the victim, but I am fighting for survival.
I am not the guilty, but I bear the pain.
I am not suicidal, but I understand it lure.
I am not ignorant, but I failed to know.
I am not the offender, but I bear the blame.
I am not religious, but I have faith.
I am not defeated, [...]
Guilt…
Posted in Anger, Anxiety, Daughters, Divorce, Emotions, Enablers, Fear, Hope, Incest, Justification, Life Stories, Mothers, Non-Offending Parent, Rape, Resiliency, Secrets, Sexual Abuse, Suicide, Survivors, Victim, childhood sexual abuse, church, church of Christ, control, dads, denial, depression, family, guilt, healing, memories, religion, sin, taking sides, tagged Add new tag, Anxiety, childhood sexual abuse, Choices, church, church of Christ, control, dads, Daughters, denial, depression, Enablers, family, Fear, guilt, Incest, Justification, Life Stories, memories, Mothers, Non-Offending Parent, Rape, religion, Sexual Abuse, sin on May 4, 2008 | 2 Comments »
He was a master of emotions. He doled out fear and anger like everyday water. I thought I was the only one who suffered from his emotional abuse, but now see the damage left on my daughters. The guilt with this recognition fills my soul as I realize I failed to protect them from his [...]
Why this blog?
This blog is the writings of a mother who finds out from her 23 year old daughter, that she was molested (from age 7 to age 11 or 12) by her dad and was told "Not to tell, especially not to tell your Mom." My heart aches and within this blog, and I hope to start a dialogue with other mothers who have gone through the same thing...Archives
-
Recent Posts
-
Recent Comments
donottellalice on I’ve Seen the Needl… Ariel on I’ve Seen the Needl… arieljoy28 on Childhood Sexual Abuse: Tellin… paintmebrave on I’ve Seen the Needl… sohurt on Justification and Excuses Give… Ana on Sad, But True: We Are Not… kangaroopaw on No More Secrets -
Top Posts
- None
Tags
Anger Anxiety Belief childhood memories childhood sexual abuse Choices church church of Christ control dads Daughters denial depression Divorce Emotions Enablers Faith false memory family Fear guilt Happiness healing Hope Incest Life Stories love memories molestation Mothers Music Non-Offending Parent Rape religion Resiliency Secrets Sexual Abuse Sisters Suicide Surviving survivor Survivors taking sides Trust Victim
